Have you often wondered how to determine if you have toxic people around you that you must avoid at all costs?
A toxic person is someone whose behavior adds negativity and upset to your life. Toxic people are often dealing with their own stresses and traumas.
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There are toxic people all around you, everywhere. You probably live with them, work with them, or are socially acquainted with them.
If you’ve ever spent time with really toxic people, you’re probably already well aware of how damaging and draining they can be.
You may be dealing with a toxic person if you know someone who is difficult and generates a lot of friction and conflict in your life. Such people can cause a lot of tension and discomfort as well as mental and physical harm for you and others.
Toxins in the people around you can cause major harm, much like toxins in your water, food, or air. You should learn how to keep yourself safe by limiting your exposure to such persons.
Recognizing when someone is toxic is an important first step in protecting yourself. Toxic people don’t come with warning labels, but there are several signs you should look out for.
Toxicity in people isn’t considered a mental disorder. However, there could be underlying mental problems that cause someone to act in toxic ways. Such mental problems include a personality disorder.
Here are some warning signs to watch out for if you think you’re dealing with a toxic person:
Many toxic people are control freaks. They want you to believe that they know everything and know how to do things in the best possible way. Such persons are typically insecure underneath all the charade.
However, as long as they’re around you, you’ll never get a chance to express yourself or do anything.
You probably know someone who is perpetually irritable and resentful. They’re suspicious of everyone and everything.
Negative people are constantly worrying, complaining about anything and everything. They often exhibit a lack of confidence, gloom, and anxiety. Such persons can be soul-destroying.
Negativity kills relationships. Spending time with negative individuals will make you feel as if they’re sucking your life away.
Toxic people are always judgmental and quick to criticize. They are poor listeners and communicators and are always quick to jump to conclusions.
There is always drama
Drama seems to always follow toxic people. They thrive in dramatic situations, inflame emotions and create conflict.
People who’re toxic are usually not interested in being stable and healthy in relationships. They love stirring the pot to see what happens.
A toxic person is almost never consistent. Their behavior is often erratic, and it’s hard for them to follow through on their commitments or promises.
Such inconsistency is very hard when you’re trying to be there for them. You never know what they’re going to do next. They can be happy with you one minute, and write you off the next.
Toxic people are manipulative and take advantage of others. They love to manipulate those around them to get what they want.
Most often, toxic people lack integrity and honesty. They will lie, exaggerate, bend the truth, or leaving out information so that you’ll take a certain action that will benefit them.
They do that as well so as to make you have a certain opinion of them. There are few things they won’t do to get their way.
They’ll do whatever it takes, even if it means hurting you. If they decide you’re an obstacle to them, they’ll come after you with everything they’ve got.
Toxic people are often very greedy. The desire to want more, achieve more, and earn more may turn toxic when a toxic person wants it all.
Their focus in life is what’s theirs and what’s not – it’s all about having, but not doing.
Toxic greed destroys relationships, just like anger. It diminishes happiness, just like depression, and fosters wariness, just like anxiety.
They Always Need Your Attention
If you have a toxic person in your life, they’ll always need something from you. They’ll bug you with constant phone calls, text messages, or they’ll show up at your door unannounced.
They always seem to need emotional support. Most often, the toxic person is not being supportive of you in return.
They take all that you have without giving much back to you. They have a heightened sense of self-interest and a desire to demonstrate their own excellence in order to be validated.
This type of toxic personality is possibly linked to narcissistic personality disorder.
They’re Chronic Liars
People often lie, but toxic people are chronic liars. They’re harmful because you never know what to believe, so you can’t count on their promises or on their word.
They will lie to you about others, and they will lie to others about you. You’re not able to tell if any truth ever comes out of their mouth.
They’re Always the Victim
Toxic people are some of the most dangerous people you can have around you because they always portray themselves as perpetual victims.
Perpetual victims look at their own issues and mistakes and always find others to blame, from their unloving parents to unreasonable bosses at work.
They never take ownership of their own lives.
Toxic people are often plagued with jealousy and envy. They’re never happy with what they have, and they never seem to be happy when good things happen to you.
They can’t appreciate it when you achieve success or move forward to greater heights in life. They feel that if anything good is going to happen, it should happen to them and not to you.
Toxic people don’t know there’s a big difference between confidence and arrogance. Confidence inspires, while arrogance intimidates.
Arrogant people always feel they know best and they often feel superior to you. They don’t want you to be confident in yourself when you’re around them, because it interferes with their arrogance.
They’re Passionate Gossipers
Toxic gossipers see themselves in the middle of a lengthy conversation with you, exchanging information. Gossip is very destructive, and they do it to lift themselves beyond their uneasiness.
Gossip and rumors can alienate friends and ruin people’s reputations. They can even lead to ostracizing behavior and other forms of relational aggression.
They Don’t Respect Your Boundaries
Another sign of toxic people is they have no boundaries. Have you been clear with a friend or family member time and again about your needs, and they just can’t help themselves but disrespect you?
Such people are toxic.
A healthy relationship is based on trust and your ability to respect each other’s boundaries. Toxic people are not capable of doing that.
They Abuse Substances
When someone around you abuses substances such as drugs and alcohol, they’re toxic. These behaviors become more toxic when the person is continually harming other people, not to mention themselves.
Dealing with Toxic People
When you notice toxic behaviors in someone, confront the person. Call them out on any lies or inconsistencies you detected.
Let the toxic person know that you don’t appreciate their behavior and give them a chance to explain themselves or apologize.
Set stricter boundaries and limit the time you spend with them until they change.
If the toxic people around you don’t change and cause you even more pain, abuse, or dishonesty, it’s time to let them go.
Stand up for yourself, cut them out of your life and move on.